Kermit & the Gang, Jim Henson's MuppetsAdmittedly, this is not Media Absurdum’s regular beat, but when an announcement evokes the saccharine memories of childhood edutainment, we pay attention.

As we wrestle with encroaching waves of mind-consuming nostalgia, we have just enough time to ecstatically announce the release of the first stamps ever to feature those wacky prime time puppets, Jim Henson’s Muppets. The colorful, fabric-skinned critters that taught you how to count, spell, and make sarcastic comments from the safety of second-tier box seats have been immortalized in the form of postage. We hope to brighten the day of many a surly bill collector by pressing one of these babies into the upper right corner of our past due payments. Happy philately!

Postal Service Unveils Muppets Stamp Set – Washington Post

Kate Moss, a.k.a. Cocaine Kate
Oops, I missed a line

By living in a cave, Media Absurdum has somehow managed to avoid reportage of any kind concerning the unveiling of model Kate Moss’s obsession with “happy dust.” Well, our pasty white skin has seen the light of day (ooh, it’s bright out here) and we’re ready to publish.

The sudden and very public exposure of Kate’s not-so-secret predilection has gotten her dropped by retailer H&M and booted by coat company Burberry. And British cosmetics company Rimmel has revealed its intention to “revisit” her contract. A public apology made by the 31-year-old model was welcomed by Coty Beauty, Rimmel’s parent company.

“We would like to express our support for all those who undertake the often difficult process of overcoming their problems.”

We remember when little Katie’s media-whoring ways were limited to posing nude and pregnant for Lucian Freud. Oh, how the never mighty have fallen.

Kind words give glimmer of hope to fallen supermodel Kate Moss – AFP via Yahoo!

Media Absurdum encourages you to explore Gawker’s complete coverage of Kate’s career suicide; it’s sarcastically delicious!

You Had Me at ‘Annulment’

September 17, 2005

Renee Zellweger & Kenny ChesneyAfter only four short months of marriage, squinty-eyed thespian Renee Zellweger and questionably popular country music star Kenny Chesney are calling it quits. Still reeling from the fact that the couple married after having known each other for only a few months, Media Absurdum is further flummoxed by the use of the term “fraud” in Zellweger’s petition for annulment. Here’s what the couple said in a joint statement to journalistic powerhouse Entertainment Tonight:

“Renee and Kenny value and respect each other and are saddened that their different objectives prevent the success of this marriage. They are disappointed that the legal term ‘annulment-fraud’ has been publicly misunderstood and exaggerated.”

Such a statement begs the question: Did the couple marry for love or business? A bachelor until the age of 37, Chesney may have had a bit of the ol’ “Tom Cruise syndrome.” (You know what we mean.)

Zellweger Asks for Privacy During Breakup – AP via Yahoo!